Sunday, December 28, 2008

Intelligent Parrot (Joke!)

A guy is browsing in a pet
shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch. It doesn't have
any feet
or legs. The guy says aloud, ' Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this
parrot?
'

The parrot says, ' I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot.
'

' Holy crap, ' the guy replies. ' You actually understood and
answered me! '

' I got every word, ' says the parrot. ' I happen to
be a highly intelligent thoroughly educated bird '

' Oh yeah? ' the
guy asks, ' Then answer this -- how do you hang onto your perch
without any
feet? '

' Well, ' the
parrot says, ' this is very embarrassing but since you asked, I wrap
my
weenie around this wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see it
because
of my feathers. '

'
Wow, ' says the guy. ' You really can understand and speak English
can't
you?'
'Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I
can companion. '

The guy looks at the $200.00 price
tag. ' Sorry, but I just can't afford that. '

' Pssssssst, ' says the
parrot, 'I' m defective, so the truth is, nobody wants me cause I
don't have
any feet. You can probably get me for $20; just make the guy an
offer!
'

The guy offers $20 and walks out with the parrot.

Weeks go
by. The parrot is sensational.. He has a great sense of humor, he's
interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he
sympathizes,
and he's insightful. The guy is delighted.

One day the
guy comes home from work and the parrot goes, ' Psssssssssssst, '
and
motions him over with one wing. ' I don't know if I should tell you
this or
not, but it's about your wife and the UPS man.. '

' What are you talking about? ' asks the
guy.

' When the UPS man delivered a package today, your wife greeted
him at the door in a sheer black nightie. '

' WHAT??? ' the guy asks incredulously.. '
THEN what happened? '

' Well, then the UPS man
came into the house and
lifted up her nightie and
began petting her all over, ' reported the parrot.

' NO! ' he
exclaims. ' And she let him? '

' Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his
knees
and began to kiss her all over.... '

Then the frantic guy demands, ' THEN WHAT HAPPENED? '

'
Damned if I know. I got a hard-on and fell off my perch! '

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